At first glance, this seems so strange. When you are in a long term relationship you think that the dating world has ended for you, and thank God for that.
Dating can be stressful and difficult to get into. Especially if you are a woman and you are past 30.
Have things changed that much since the last time I was here? Do men really think it is expectable to touch you on the first date? Should I call him or should I wait for him to call me?
These are all things that go through your head when first you meet.
It is very different, than when you were younger. You are more conscious of what is and what is not desirable to you in a mate.
When in your 20’s it was all about chemistry. You weren’t necessarily thinking long term. Whatever felt right at the time was great, and go for it.
In your 30’s it was all about Mr Right. Who could you find to have children with [that is if you hadn’t already had them in your 20’s] and who would be your soul mate to share your life with.
When you divorce in your 50’s dating becomes a whole other thing.
It is now about trusting that the other person is who they say they are.
And while chemistry is great, it isn’t all important. What the person’s life says about them, how they have treated their past relationships[because you tend to see a pattern in past relationships, I know I have one] where they want to be in the future. Because lets face it, your future is limited by time. As a woman, we don’t want to be doing this again in another 20 years.
So trust is essential.
Most women wont believe this, but there is a large population of men out there who want to date a woman older then them.
I am not really sure what I think about this. It is surely flattering, but is it real?
And then there is the financial aspect to all of this. You don’t want to date someone who is still trying to find their pot of gold.
In the past, I was willing to work with my ex’s toward a future together, and by that I mean financially. But having been bitten more than once by that dog, I find I don’t want to pet them anymore.
So that means that who I choose to develop a relationship with has to be self sufficient.
And then you want someone you can admire. Someone who is interesting, well spoken, has a zest for life. And looks really seem unimportant now.
Don’t get me wrong, a handsome face and a nice butt are great. But is that all there is to life?
Been down THAT road, and I assure you, it is not.
I was told by my soon to be ex-husband, that I was not able to change, had a negative outlook and something else that I cant remember that was said to demean.
I think that I have proven that to be false.
So here I am. Moving forward, with lots of opportunities. And a positive outlook on the future, and not afraid to put myself out there in this crazy dating world.
But THIS time I intend to be smarter, and more aware of whom I am trusting with my heart.
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